Dateline: 26 April 2000
So complete with broken knee the apartment decides it's time to try and kill me again. It's had quite a few attempts, using the bathroom as its weapon of choice, last used in December 1998.
This reminds me of an incident in John Keene's Pettibone's Law where Major Poultron, that ham-fisted plumber of an aviator, managed to take off with the wings of his F4-B folded, with his RIO, C. Ross Culpepper, in the back seat. Once he got it airborne, one might say he had control problems.
Procedures had been forgotten and the
L WING PIN UNLOCKED
as well as the
The take off roll was long, which nearly screwed up Moon Dog's all time TPQ record. But, eventually Poltroun got airborne, but wanted to get back on the ground most ricky-tick. At this point the squadron's CO, Al ``Shakey'' Morgankrank, began to take an interest in this situation because nothing was worth the loss of an airplane in this good deal war.
In his haste to get back on the ground, procedures were forgotton, and Poltroun landed gear up; 50000 pounds of airplane, fuel and bombs, sliding down the runway, just waiting to blow up.
Morgankrank was livid and in his haste to land, and pull Poltroun's wings, he too forgot to lower his gear. Two belly landings, resulting in the runway landing lights being put out of commission, effectively closing the base.
To quote John Keene:
By morning the troops had the two airplanes up in seemingly
strategic positions in front of the hanger. The squadron's
call letter were ``sierra hotel'', painted boldly on the verticle
stabiliser of each aircraft. On one bird this was left intact,
but on the other, before light, someone had sprayed out
the ``sierra hotel'' and painted in ```india tango''. From
the aspect of the flight line, they were aligned perfectly
and the silent message was displayed to their little world:
If you think these shots are bad, you should see it up close.
RIO: Radar Intercept Officer
Red Death: Some god awful concoction of corned beef and ketchup.
ARVN: Army of the Republic of Vietnam
MAG-22: Marine Air Group 22
TPQ: A night radar guided bombing mission. Unlike the A-6 the F-4 was not an all weather attack aircraft.